Why Facebook sucks

I have been very aware of the side effects of Facebook. For myself, that is. Because its so addictive, it was really hard for me to actually go and do something about not wasting so much time stalking people, putting up superficial status updates, waiting for people to like stuff on my profile etc. However much it helps me keep in touch with friends and long lost acquaintances, keeps me in the loop with world events, trends, hot sensations and other similar stuff, i don’t know if all of that should trump the state of my mental health. It’s pretty stupid when you think of Facebook driving you crazy- literally- but it’s true. One fine day whilst studying for some really tough exams, I kept logging onto Facebook for no reason- I realized that I needed to somehow find a way to STOP. So I deactivated my account on the condition that I would go back to it after my exams would finish. It’s been more than two weeks since the pact expired but I still haven’t reactivated my account. And I feel amazing. Here are some reasons why:

1) I can study for long stretches at a time without feeling the compelling need to check if anyone posted on my wall, replied to my message, or just to check if I have any new notifications. I also felt like i did a lot better in these past exams because I wasn’t distracted.

2) I feel less heavy inside. I was very aware of the fact that peoples’ lives upset me. For example, people going to parties that I wasn’t invited to or couldn’t go to, or people keeping in touch with those who I hadn’t made the effort with- and regretted not doing so. It made me feel heavy and jealous. I didn’t like the feeling and although I’m very aware of the fact that I am my own master I guess this is where my avoidant coping skills stepped in.

3) I was also very conscious about who could see what on my profile. There were pictures etc that I had kept on strict private settings but had people view them somehow or the other. I felt as if my privacy had been breached and didn’t like it. I made me worried and always trying to up my privacy settings. By deactivating my account I don’t have to worry about that kind of stuff.

4) I was a Facebook addict. There was always a feeling of anxiety about the stuff that I posted, whether I should post or not, what people would think about it, why people didn’t ‘like’ whatever I’d posted etc. it was ridiculous. So much social desirability. So much need for validation. It was sad. It was becoming cyclical and I was very aware of my thought processes and really felt as if there was a need to put an end to it.

5) I was very conscious. Overly conscious. Of what? To create an impression on someone specific. Someone who I keep writing about; someone who’s on my mind quite a lot. I was very conscious of what content this person would see, would try to make him jealous by carefully selecting ‘envy worthy’ stuff to post, would wonder whether he saw it or not etc. it was crazy. It was like a running header of a research paper you’re writing- just always there. So to break this chain reaction, I felt that it was better if I stepped back to put an end to it. I could delete him but something inside me doesn’t want to. Maybe in time I will find that strength.

I’m pretty happy without Facebook in my life. Sure I haven’t spoken to a lot if my friends for a while, don’t know about hot social networking trends, haven’t kept in touch with people who I can’t without Facebook, but I feel very happy and content. I like it better this way. I’ll probably go back to Facebook in a while when I can’t take it anymore, but till then I’m going to enjoy this vacation. 🙂

We are all so blessed

I’m very aware of the fact that most of my posts are negative and depressing- making me look like I’m always unhappy, ungrateful and often, mentally unwell. I probably am all of those things. But it’s days like this (days when I’m not PMS’ing lol) when I sit down and think about how amazing my life is- how I’d like to live this way forever. Sheltered, living with a lack of responsibilities, facing problems that are probably a fraction of what real life problems are like, living in a time and age when both my parents are alive and happy…and a feeling that tells me that my youth has just begun.

I don’t know how much longer I’ll get to live the luxury of following the routine of a student. Exams, sleeping and waking up late, socializing with friends during school, making fun of teachers, cramming last minute for final exams, taking part in student activities, chilling during a three month summer vacation and most of all, dreading going back to school after this long break. It passes by so fast, and has been doing so, that one doesn’t realize how it went by. I love the feeling of still being able to avoid responsibilities that I know I should be taking charge of; but I have an excuse: I’m young and don’t need to if I don’t want to. I can lay in my air conditioned room, watch Friends episodes all day, spend hours on Facebook without feeling like the pressure of life on my shoulders. I can rest against the softness of my pillow and write without a care in the world that I have an exam tomorrow morning.

I’m so lucky to have had ample opportunities all throughout my life and an amazing set of parents who’ve literally given their lives for my brother and I. I can’t imagine living without them. As much as I would like to explore the world on my own and be independent, in this very moment I’d like things to stay the way they are. I’d like my parents to never die or suffer in any way. I’d like to go to school everyday of my life. I’d like to have fights with my mom about late-night curfews. I’d like to get wasted at a club without caring how I old I am. Id like to preserve every inch of my youth and all the benefits that come along with it.

I graduate in 8 months or so. I’d very much like to slow things down and live like I’m never going to grow older and step into the real world. The real world scares me. It means change. It means that I’m way behind at this point in time. It means that I have to grow up. It means that I’ll never get this time back.
I love the way things are right now despite whatever other problems I go through. Doesn’t everyone have problems?

I’m so blessed. I have love, I have life, I have resources, I have intellect, I have health, I have enough money, I have education, I have friends, I have opportunities, I have memories, I have sense, I have family- I have the future.

The Girl With No Name

A stranger in the crowd walking past you. You don’t know her. You don’t know her dirty secrets. You have no judgments. You have no biases. To you she’s just another face in the crowd; another person just going about her life like you are. You don’t need to know her; you don’t need to know where she comes from, why she walks the way she does or looks at people the way she does. To you she’s faceless.

You’re at a club. Strobe lights glaze your eyes. The alcohol in your blood pumps you to another level. A stranger next to you dances her way all through the night. You don’t know her. You don’t know why she’s dancing the way she is. You don’t care who she dances with. You’re without judgement at amount of exposed skin you can see. You’re indifferent to the half-consumed glass of vodka in her hand. You turn to her and welcome her energy, accepting her fun-loving nature and free state of mind in that moment. You’re not labeling her in your mind. You’re not judging her actions. You’re not evaluating that guy’s hands around her waist as he holds her close to him. You don’t know how much appreciation you got that night.

She stands up and voices her differing opinion. She speaks her mind in the face of opposition. She realizes she’s in a minority. She knows she’s a woman. You watch as people pass looks. You watch as people whisper words of resentment and shock to each other. They don’t know her. She continues to speak- loud and clear. You don’t say a word. There’s no judgment in your mind. To you she’s a stranger. You listen to her words silently. You don’t agree. You listen. You think it’s bullshit. But to you she’s just another person with a another point of view. She finishes talking and takes her seat. You politely clap. You tell her you’re proud she had balls despite your differences.

You’re sitting in a bus. She’s merely a stranger to you. You see her lips moving as she recites a prayer. You realize she’s the same girl from the club that night- but this time she’s praying. You don’t know what she’s praying for; you don’t know what makes her pray; you don’t know who she’s praying to. You have no God. You obviously don’t share her belief. You don’t question the conflict between the two sides of her that you’ve seen. You don’t hold value judgements against her. You don’t challenge her conflicting practices. You don’t tell her she’s a traitor to her god. You watch as she sends love to her maker. You don’t wish to be like her but you don’t negate what she does. To you, what she had done in front of your eyes previously made her no different to what she was now in front of you. You assume that others from her faith would readily shun her if they knew. They’d call her a hypocrite. A non believer. A liar. But you appreciate her for who she is. You didn’t know it, but you gave her strength.

She’s mixed up. She’s out to live life. You didn’t know it but she was just a visitor. Temporary. Like yourself. You didn’t realize what your acceptance meant to her. You gave her solace and peace of mind- even if it was for that moment. You let her seek refuge from the pointing fingers and the glaring stares that she was used to. You still don’t know her- and probably never will. She doesn’t know you either. She doesn’t know what you did for her. But she knows that you were also just another face in the crowd that added to her comfort. If she knew you, she’d thank you for letting her be who she was- even if it was temporary….

Degrees of Democracy


Home » News & Politics
Degrees of Democracy

By Sara Kazi    18 AUGUST 2010

When Jamshed Dasti appeared before the Supreme Court to prove his innocence over charges of cheating and lying his way into parliament, the nation witnessed two things: a functioning judicial system and a shameless politician. The PPP MNA from Muzaffargarh was accused of holding a fake master’s degree in Islamic Studies, and so he was being held accountable before the nation’s highest court. When the judges asked Dasti to name the first 15 chapters from the Holy Quran, the only response they received was silence. This silence endured even after a judge asked, “How about the first two?” Dasti voluntarily resigned in the days that followed. Nonetheless after his verdict was announced, Dasti openly called the court’s decision a joke and claimed that the court of public opinion in his district was the only one that mattered.


Jamshed Dasti is just one of the many politicians who were found guilty of acquiring fake degrees. By the end of July 2010, the degrees of 47 members of parliament and provincial assemblies had been verified as fake and many more were expected to be added to the list. The PML-N was leading the pack with the the PPP following closely behind.

The roots of the scandal grew from a 2002 law imposed by General Pervez Musharraf that stated that all candidates standing for parliamentary elections must have a bachelors degree or equivalent. Despite the former president defending his stance by saying that the move would improve the quality of lawmakers, critics believe that it was a tactic to sideline particular opponents from contesting elections. Others termed it undemocratic in a country of 180 million people where less than 50 per cent of adults are literate.

During the elections held in 2008, there were a few candidates who decided to sneak under the radar and take oath on the Quran, despite not having the required degrees. Now, a couple of accusations against a few lawmakers have ballooned into one of Pakistan’s biggest political scandals under the current administration. Degrees of at least eight federal and provincial ministers have so far been found to be forged or invalid by the Higher Education Commission (HEC). However, the numbers are expected to increase as the degrees of more than 800 parliamentarians are yet to be authenticated.

Investigations have been prolonged, intense and often dramatic. There have been alleged kidnappings, scandals of cheating politicians being exposed in front of the nation, and allegations that the government was trying to slow the verification process down. The federal government gave the Higher Education Commission the task of collecting and verifying the degrees of the 1,170 parliamentarians of the nation by July 27, 2010 (extended from July 8, 2010). However, the deadline had to be extended two weeks further when it was announced that only 270 degrees had been properly processed. Furthermore, by the date of submission, the HEC had not received proper credentials of 595 parliamentarians. Helping the Commission go about this task (in accordance with a standard procedure) were 36 universities, which included Punjab University, Karachi University, Allama Iqbal Open University, and Shah Abdul Latif Bhitai University. However, on July 20, 2010, 516 degrees out of 736 degrees were sent back by the HEC to the respective universities for not being assessed according to the pre-set guidelines. Out of the 63 degrees sent back to Punjab University, four degrees, one of a senator and three of MPAs of the Punjab Assembly, were found to be fake.

Some speculate government tampering. According to Ansar Abbasi of The News, Education Minister Sardar Aseff Ahmed Ali was approached by the presidency to stop the verification process of parliamentarians’ degrees “at all costs.” President Asif Ali Zardari is apparently quite distressed by the entire ordeal as it is alleged that he believes it is merely a conspiracy to oust his PPP government. His fears were mirrored by Information Secretary Fauzia Wahab. While talking to various media personnel outside Bilawal House recently, she said that the fake-degree scam was nothing more than an attempt to “derail” democracy. She never explained how having politicians lie their way into parliament was democratic.

The fight spread to the institutions in the middle of the crisis. A duel between the HEC and the Education Ministry of Pakistan broke out. The HEC began sending out degrees to various universities for inspection without consulting the education ministry, to the annoyance of the Federal Minister for Education, Sardar Aseff Ahmed Ali; he termed it unconstitutional. In a statement, he said that the HEC should have conferred with the ministry before initiating the assessment of the MPs’ degrees. In response, HEC Chairman Dr Javaid Leghari stood by his actions saying that the HEC was the only institution that had the right to recognise the validity of any degree issued in Pakistan or abroad and was doing nothing that was against the government’s policy.

A lot has been said about the overwhelming pressures that Dr Leghari has been facing from different political groups, parliamentarians and even the federal government. There were media reports about the HEC chairman being forced to resign from his post. In a meeting with Prime Minister Yousuf Raza Gilani about the problems he was facing, Dr Leghari related accounts of maltreatment of his family members during raids at his family home in Goth Leghari. But then things escalated to a whole new level. On July 13, Leghari’s brother Farooq Leghari, a former District Coordination Officer (DCO), was reported missing by his family. It was later discovered that he had been arrested on charges of inappropriately obtaining four to five crore rupees worth of land and vehicles at the expense of the provincial exchequer. It was hardly surprising that all these accusations surfaced just days before the HEC chairman was to announce the names of the politicians whose degrees were forged.

Top politicians and MNAs such as senior minister of Khyber-Pakhtunkhwa Rahim Dad Khan, Syed Muhammad Salman Mohsin, Mazhar Hayat of the PML-N, and Hayatullah Khan Tareen, Nasir Ali Shah and Mir Hamayun Aziz of the PPP have been found guilty of possessing fake degrees, while other important figures such as President Asif Ali Zardari, his sister Faryal Talpur, Senator Ms Ratna Bhagwandas and MNAs Dewan Syed Ashiq Hussain Bukhari and Mir Amir Ali Khan Magsi are being considered as suspects.

The question of punishment and justice lingers awkwardly in the air. With the current numbers, approximately 47 MNAs could face disqualification from parliament or hefty prison sentences. Despite calls from politicians such as Tehreek-e-Istaqlal’s president, Rehmat Khan Wardag, for a lifetime ban on parliamentarians holding fake degrees, the Supreme Court has said that those found guilty may only face a maximum prison sentence of three years. The apex court’s decision reflects section 78 of the Representation of People Act, 1976. However, Section 100 of the same act states that a person guilty of a corrupt practice could be disqualified from being elected as a member of the Assembly. Secretary Election Commission of Pakistan, Ishtiaq Ahmed, announced that any parliamentarian found to be guilty will be given the chance to explain his case to the courts.

Despite the tumultuous ups and downs that the nation has witnessed throughout this scandal, there have been incidents that have been quite amusing, such as the time when Balochistan’s Chief Minister, Aslam Raisani, uttered the historic words, “A degree is a degree! Whether fake or genuine, it’s a degree! It makes no difference!” According to PPP leader, Sardar Aseff Ahmed, “The courts should focus on other issues of more significance rather than taking up the fake degrees cases.” It is not surprising that the PPP feels this way. The PPP government faces mid-term elections if more party members are found to be fake-degree holders – a thought that most probably thrills the opposition.

Luckily for Jamshed Dasti, on April 21, 2008, the Supreme Court removed the requirement of candidates possessing a degree to participate in the general elections on the pretext that the Musharraf-imposed law was in contradiction to Article 17 (freedom of association) and Article 25 (equality of citizens) of the Constitution. Even though he was previously found guilty of possessing a fake degree, Dasti was not only made the adviser on livestock to the Prime Minister but a fortnight later was also granted a ticket to contest by-elections from the same NA-178 Muzaffargarh-111 constituency by the PPP. Despite disqualification petitions launched by rivals such as Nawabzada Iftikhar Ahmad, Dasti later won the elections. His punishment and disgrace has seemed to come to naught. The more things change, the more they stay the same.